Living in a strange time

This is not about knitting. If you came for knitting today, don’t read on. This is just my little story - one of millions. I’m sure there are worse. In fact, I know it.

The unedited email below was in response to an Australian friend who I’ve known for 20 years. He was someone I’d taught with in Brooklyn and he wrote to check in on me. The date of the email was April 8th, more than a month ago. It sums up how I felt then and mostly how I still feel. The parts in brackets are for explanation purposes. The pictures are just random, non-knitting pictures I have taken during this time.

Before you read this you should know that I feel very lucky and grateful - I’ve regained my health, the people I love are well and safe, and I’m still employed.

You should also know that I live in a suburb of New York City, about 50 miles out. To give you some idea of the toll this has taken in my part of the world, as of this writing, the county I live in, Suffolk, has had more COVID-related deaths than the entire state of Ohio, and more deaths by half than Texas.

Dear Paul,

First, I am glad you are keeping well and safe. The world is indeed a very new and different place. Never in my wildest imagination could I have thought that I would not be at Mass on Palm Sunday with the thought of not doing it again this Sunday on Easter. This whole week is shaping up to be particularly sad. I'm sure there's a reason for it (slow down, spend more time with those you love, read more, pray more, etc.) although I'm having trouble seeing the devastation. But like my dad always says, the world isn't waiting for you to catch up with it, you need to adjust, and I guess we all do. When this is finally over, we will all need to rethink how we live our daily lives. 

Apparently, NYC is a ghost town. The last time I was there was March 13th and the last time I took the train was the 11th. I saw pictures of Penn Station the other day at "rush hour" .... empty. Very little street traffic, NYPD has a record number of officers sick with the virus, the public neighborhood parks are mostly closed. The governor has put our state on “pause” until May 15th and is doing a good job of keeping everyone calm and managing resources. [The “pause” was just extended to June 7th this weekend.]

Next I haven't been well. I have non-COVID pneumonia. 

On March 13th, we were notified that school would be closing, effective end of day. We all came in on Monday, 16th to prepare for how we were going to handle online learning in the interim. Even the PreK needed to do it, but the DOE [Department of Education] provided no direction, so as the director I needed to come up with a plan. At the same time, my own parents were still in Florida. I had begged them to come up the week before, offering to fly down and drive them back myself. Everyone was against it, including my brother. It is the very last time I do not trust my instincts because by the time they decided to leave, we were in the middle of it. On Thursday, 19th, they drove up to North Carolina and my brother and I drove down to meet them and then I hopped in my parents' car and drove my dad while my brother drove my mom back in his car. We did it in one long 17-hour day, but we did not have to stay overnight anywhere, for which I was grateful. However, it took a toll on my health, I suppose. 

When I got home, I was exhausted and rested most of that Friday, but by Sunday morning I was running a fever. Joe [my husband] called the doctor on Monday, 23rd who had a virtual visit with me and said I should self-quarantine and see if the fever broke, but it didn't. By Monday afternoon, Joe was on the phone with the state DOH [Department of Health] to see if they could get me in for testing. They said they would call back, but didn't until Friday, 27th. They could not get me into Stony Brook (a bike ride away), so sent me to Jones Beach for testing the following Tuesday, 31st! By that time, I still had a fever and the doctor wanted to see me in his office after the testing. He diagnosed the pneumonia, sent me over for a chest x ray and put me on antibiotics. The following day I got the negative test results back, but I didn't feel better (or get rid of the temperature) until this past Saturday night. It's been a long haul. I feel much better, but I am still too tired to stand too long or walk too far. I am trying to slow down but that is not always so easy for me to do, as you know. 

Luckily, the miracle in all this is that no one else got sick from my being sick. No one at work with whom I am in close contact daily, not my brother or parents with whom I was in a car for hours and hours, and no one at home, particularly Joe who was so sweet in taking such good care of me through all this, even with all his own health issues. And I am very grateful for all the people who were praying for me. Turns out there were quite a lot, some I didn't even know about.

I am still "virtually" in the classroom with the teachers and students for about 1.5 hours each day, and the teachers and I meet regularly to plan, but it is not the same. In my heart I feel like this school year is over [It is.]. Connie [my daughter and knitwear model] is still working from home and Peter [my youngest son] is still virtually going to school. Gerard's [my middle son] company shut down, but I'm sure he'll be called back when things are normal again, although he's saying he's not even sure he wants to go back, so he's re-assessing which, in his case, is a good thing. Another sad thing is that Peter is scheduled to graduate [from college] next month, but there will be no public ceremony I am sure, and my last little chick will not walk across the stage to get his undergraduate diploma. He's not devastated, but Joe and I are. 

It is so nice of you to think of us. I’m very happy that you and Sue are well and that you are able to be with your daughter and son-in-law and especially the boys. What a distraction! Oh, how I wish I had that one. I’m sure you and Sue will be able to reschedule the trip and all will be well. We'll get through this and hopefully you'll come back to NY too. 

Be safe and be well and enjoy those beautiful boys!!!

Love,

Joan